Hey people! I hope you are keeping safe. What does a whore really mean, what is it exactly? Ever asked yourself to what degree of being a whore are you? If yes, worry no more, mama gotcha! So I came up with a couple of basic rules of finding your degree. They are not exhaustive though, so feel free to add your category when you feel left out.
So the first basic rule, if the body count is in the ones, you are a straight up virgin. If it falls between 1 and 9, you are not up to the title. So even if some in the spirit of calling you names, stop them and tell them your preferred alternative to the name. Another thing, one oral sex doesn’t count. It is basically foreplay. When it gets to four, it becomes one smash. Here, it is counted in clusters. Basically, twenty orals makes five smashes. From there, you can calculate your body count.
If you earn the whore title then have a 6 months old dry spell, you automatically reset the whore button. You are considered as cleansed and you’re whore status is revoked. When you finally get the one person and decide to settle. By settling I mean, three complete months with the same person, your whore points are reduced by 10% every other week.
The other most important condition, if you get in bed with someone other than your partner at least two months before your wedding, you are almost joining the whore committee. You are maybe a “whoregram” influencer. Three different partners in a week and your body count is equal or more your age, you are a legendary whore. You are the Oscars and the Grammy’s of this title.
This is the last and the biggest title holders. If your friends validate their whoreness from you, you are the momma whore. Hats are tipped to you. You should wear a red gown for your wedding. You can handle anything and everything.
I'm out.
Remember to follow us on Facebook @Eldoret Uncensored 😉
Comments